One Year Ago

by Amelia Kanan

Out for dinner, a year ago, for a friends' birthday. (Photo by Gina Cella)

In honor of the time that seems to  be flying I felt it would be fitting to screech my brakes, smell the burnt rubber and look in the rear view mirror to examine what I was doing one year ago.

Typical Schedule: I worked Tuesday, Thursday and Friday as a professional friend for my family. Monday and Wednesday mornings I worked with “my” director on the doc and in the afternoon picked L and H up from school. Then, I usually stayed for dinner and perhaps took in a show with one of their parents (they are songwriters, hence the “show”).

My little chickens on a typical Friday. Football, food and fun in Meme's backyard.

I was on a hiatus from the gym and yoga. Although, I would still go to my gym to sit in the sauna and shower because I liked the locker room. I feel like I might have had some sort of injury but I can’t remember…

Most of my favorite people, I got to see on a weekly basis.

My go-to foods at this time were dependent on my locale. Downtown: A cut of fatty tuna that I’d slide up, and eat with dried seaweed dipped in wasabi and soy sauce and a seaweed salad. Hollywood or Valley:  A salad from the Salad bar at Gelson’s: Spirng mix, beets, red onion, green peps, shrooms, cucumber, cherry tomato, egg whites, cottage cheese, oil and balsamic and sunflower seeds.

I lived in downtown Los Angeles in the Arts District. It kind of reminded me of Detroit. Although I liked the vibe it was not very convenient and seemed out of the way from my life. Plus, I was over living in a loft.

Game night, Feb 2011

A year ago today, I hosted a game night at Kev and Pepe’s where we played Apples to Apples. That night, I wore a black Mexican dress with jeans. Kev made a comment about how I never wear jeans and should do it more often and then I yelled at him for looking at me. My team lost at Celebrity. Kk got really mad, even though she wasn’t on my team.

I didn’t have any crushes. Oh. Maybe one but he wasn’t anybody exciting.

I wasn’t writing or photographing much because the documentary was eating my   creativity.

Around this time, I fired my first person. He was the editor of the documentary. My director made me be the bad guy. Typical.

We're still editing this bitch.

This is my director, editing the documentary without the editor because we fired him————————>

Steve actually lives here in Detroit too now. I’m so grateful to have him, a piece of LA with me. Not to mention, a collaborator, motivator and cheerleader. Plus, my walking partner. We used to go for long, winding and climbing walks and even though it’s cold and flat here, somethings never change. He still wears scarves like that. Although his beard has grown tremendously.

A year ago, I was in a weird place. Autopilot. Not really sure what my next step could be and I was feeling stuck. I wasn’t happy where I lived, I wasn’t feeling challenged and I wasn’t sure what to change in order for me to be happy.

One year ago helped me realize that no matter how many of my favorite people I am surrounded with that I love and that love me, no matter if I’m surrounded by geographical beauty and mild weather and no matter if my fresh food options are abundant, it still doesn’t mean anything if I’m not living the life I want to be living.

Thank you February of 2011. Thank you for the rut, the laughs, my jobs, the restaurants, the people, the hiking trails, my lofted bedroom that I had to climb a ladder to get to, the sun, Gelson’s, Novel Cafe, my van and most of all, my loved ones: friends, family, kids, parents, peers and grandma’s. You taught me so much and I am utterly grateful for the lessons.