Ready, Willing and Able

by Amelia Kanan

Lessons are rampant these days. Personally, professionally, emotionally, socially, etc. Revelations are constant. One in particular, is that I can feel the wanderer within me craving settlement. I’m pretty shocked I would feel this way. Since I’ve moved to the West Coast, my adventuring and curious spirit was untamable. For a long time, “settling” seemed like surrendering and the death of a large part of myself. The idea of ever owning a house sounded like a prison to me, the visual of working for someone else seemed terrifying and the thought of being married and having children seemed very far away. In my mind, all those things seemed scary due to the responsibility and sacrifice. It’s been a slow realization however, I see all those things in a brand new, golden and beautiful light. It’s not that I’m glorifying these scenarios nor am I seeing them without the sacrifice but rather without the fear of it. I’ve realized, through all of my phases, my spirit always remains constant. Just because I own a house and come home to the same person ever day doesn’t mean I stop being a free spirit. I’m now confident that when these things begin to happen in my life, I’m still going to be me and even a better me. I see how far I’ve already come, how much I’ve grown, the phases I’ve experienced, the knowledge I’ve gained, the mistakes I’ve made, the triumphs I’ve had, the people I’ve met and the more that are to come. This excites me and keeps me dancing along. Even though this moment in life is hard I know there are good things to come and I’m ready for it, motivated to fight for it and open to where I’m supposed to go.